Week 34

Control is a funny thing. Control over a person, an animal or an object can be absolute but can self control be the same. Self control and control of my feelings seems to be significantly harder than controlling the kettlebell. The simple mechanical action, combining hips, arms and shoulders to move a lump of metal through a smooth arc just highlights the lack of control I feel over other parts of my health.

When I started this challenge it was a real effort. Physically and mentally. I had to dig deep and drag myself out of bed, put my kit on, pick up the bell and swing. Small sets, long rest periods. Boredom. Frustration. Even a little bit of embarrassment as I wonder what people thought of me. It was an effort but I gritted my teeth and did it. The willpower, the determination and the discipline I had to muster to keep going showed through in other areas too. I was more disciplined with my food. Had more willpower with alcohol. As the challenge has become, frankly, less of a challenge those spin offs have diluted and my body is going back to the dad bod shape again. 

The challenge is now a habit. A good habit. One with positive benefits, like brushing my teeth and washing my hands. Just like those I’m not doing it mindfully anymore and as a result I’m not linking it to other parts of my life. How do I reconnect the pieces? How do I bring the whole package back together? Any suggestions would be welcome.

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